PM [47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#1
1. Mobile Ka Vitamin
Na Jany Kon Sa Vitamin Hai Mobile Me
Ek Din Use Na Karun To
Kamzori Mehsoos Hony Lagti Hai.
2. Itni Piyari
Meri Wali To Itni Piyari Hai K
Sirf Log Hi Nahi,
Rotiyan Bhi Us Se Jal Jati Hen
3. Rasta
Dost Teri Yaad Me Susu Lag Gaya..
Dost Teri Yaad Me Susu Lag Gaya..
Ye Bhi Aansu Hi Hai Pagly,,
Bas Zara Sa Rasta Badal Gaya..
4. Total Safai
"Safai Nisf Emaan Hai"
Iska Ye Matlab To Nahi Hai K Aap
Sara Din Apni Naak Me Ungli Daaly Raho..
Fairgh Bethi Thi Socha Aapko Bata Dun.
[b]5. Wazan
Soch Rahi Hun K Thora Wazan Barha Loon,,
Log Aaj Kal Mujhy Halky Me Le Rahy Hen..
6.Single
Ek Muddat Baad Kisi Larki Ny "I Love U" Kaha..
Maary Khushi K "Same To U" K Bajaye "Shame To U" Keh Diya..
Wo Kehny Lagi "Saaly Tu Single Hi Mary Ga
7.Khujoor
Meri Sadgi Hi Mujh Ko Maar Gai
Wo "Date" Ka Kehti Rahi Aur Me Khujoor Lata Raha
8. Dimagh Kam Tha
Hamen To Apno Ny Loota Ghairon Me Kahan Dam Tha
Best Friend Bhi Aisa Mila Jis Ka Dimagh Kam Tha
9. Bandar Kehta
Me Aapko Chand Kehta,
Lekin Usme Bhi Daag Hai
Me Aapko Suraj Kehta,
Lekin Usme Bhi Aag Hai..
Me Aapko Bandar Kehta,
Lekin Usme Bhi Dimagh Hai[color]
[color=red]10. Munni Badnaam Ho Gai
Hum pe Mar K Munni Badnaam Ho Gai
Wah Wah Wah
Hum pe Mar K Munni Badnaam Ho Gai,
Akele Ho Gaye Thy Munni K Bina
Ye Acha Hua Kambakhat Sheela Time Pe Jawan Ho Gai
11. Motapay Se Mat Daren
Agar Aapka Pait Bahar Nikal Raha Hai To
Ghabrayen Nahi Usay Nikalny Den..
Aakhir Sab Ka Dil Kerta Hai
Bahar Ghoomny Ka
12. Samajhdaari
Waqt Waqt Ki Baat Hai
Kabhi Ghar Me Pary Rehny Walon Ko Nikamma Kaha Jata Tha,
Magar Aaj Kal Hamari Samajhdaari Ki Misalen Di Jati Hen
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#2
13. Only Chocolate
Dentist: What Kind Of Filling Do You Want In Your Tooth..??
Pappu: Only Chocolate..
14. Gandhi Ji K 3 Bandar
Gandhi Ji K 3 Bandar Banany K Bajaye
Agar Ek He Bandar Ko Mobile De Diya Jata To
Teeno Kaam Ho Jaty.
Na Wo Dekhta, Na Sunta, Na Hi Kuch Bolta
15. Repeat Saas
Brahma Ji Ki Chetavni:
WhatsApp Per Repeat Post
Kerny Waly K Agly Janam Me
Jeevan Sathi Bhi Repeat Hoga Aur Wo Bhi Repeat Saas K Sath
16. Internet Per
Internet Per Ladki Pataai,
Internet Per Ho Gai Sagaai,
Internet Per Hi Divorce Ho Gaya,
Isi Bahany Computer Ka Course Ho Gaya
17.Bhabhi Ji Namasty
Yun Dekha Na Kero Hamen Hansty Hansty
Yun Dekha Na Kero Hamen Hansty Hansty
Mere Dost Bohat Gustakh Hen
Keh Dengy Tumhen Bhabhi Ji Namasty
18. Toilet
Akshay's New Movie Toilet Ko Dekhny K Liye Aap Friends Ko Kese Kahen Gy??
"Chalo Toilet Dekhny Chalte Hen."
Aur Maza To Tab Aayega Jab
Aap Apna Whatsapp Status Updates Karengy
At Toilet With GF And Two Other Friends
19. Me Kiya Kerun
Boy: Tujh Me Rab Dikhta Hai, Yara Me Kiya Kerun.?
Girl: Tu Darshan Le, Dakshna De,
Aashirvad Le Aur Nikal Le.
Line Me Aur Bhi Log Khary Hen
20. Breaking News
Breaking News..
Ek Choohay Ne Ek Poora Suit Kutar K Kha Lia,
Magar Wo Phir Bhi Bhook Se Mar Gaya
Q k
Wo SUIT
Mallika Sharawat
Ka Tha
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#3
21. 1000 ka Sawal
Son On Phone:
Maa Me KBC se Bol Raha Hun.
Mere Pitaji ka Naam kya hai.?
Maa: Sawal Kitne ka Hai?
Santa: 1000 ka..
Maa: Quit kar de Kamine,
1000 k Liye Ghar me Talwaren Chalwaega Kya
22.Aakhri Khuwahish
Marty Huwe Sharabi Se
Bhagwan Ny Us Ki Aakhri Khuwahish Puchi..
Sharabi: Agly Janam Me
Mujhy Daant Beshak Ek Hi Dena,
Magar Liver 32 Dena.
Ek Dety Ho,
Sala Itni Jaldi Kharab Ho Jata Hai
23. South Indian Movies
Everything Is Fair In
Love,
War
And
.
.
.
.
.
South Indian Movies
24.Bcoz Item Means "Maal"
Maal Means "Paisa"
Paisa Means "Laxmi"
Aur
Ladkiyan to Ghar Ki Laxmi Hoti Hen.
.
"Rishta Wohi Soch Nayi"
25. Rajnikant Garba Me Dhol
Rajnikant Garba Me Dhol Baja Raha Tha..
Achanak Dharti Per Kuch Aliens Aye Aur
Kehny Lagy:
Yaar Rajnikant,Hamary Bachon K Exam Chal Rahy Hen.
Zara Ahista Dhol Bajao,
Hamara Planet Disturb Ho Raha Hai
26. Aap Sab Janty Hen
Najoomi: Aap Ny Kal Hi 10 Kilo Chawal Kharide Hen.
Admi: Aap Mahaan Hai Maharaj,
Aap Sab Janty Hen.
Najoomi: Saaly Agli Baar Apni Kundli Lana,
Rashan Card Nahi
27. Itni Jaldi Q Utha Liya
45 Years Old Lady:
Hey Bhagwan, Mujhy Itni Jaldi Q Utha Liya.??
Yamraj: Neechy Tu Apny Pati Ka Dimagh Chaat rahi Thi
Yahan Mera,,
Ziyada Dimagh Ki Dahi Mat Ker,,
March Me Closing Chal Rahi Hai,
Target Pura Kerna Hai
28.Sacha Desh Bhagt
Teacher: Batao Sacha Desh Bhagt Kon hota hai?
Sardar: Sir Ji, Jo English Toilet Seat Per bhi
Indian Style me Bethta ho
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#4
29.Star Plus Shayeri
Star Plus Shayeri..
Ek Bhaalu Roz Ek Larki Se Milny Jata Hai..
Wah Wah..
Ek Bhaalu Roz Ek Larki Se Milny Jata Hai..
Ab Tum Hi Batao
"Ye Rishta Kiya Kehlata Hai
30. Toilet
Aaj Kal K Bachon Ny Parhna Chhor Diya.
Wah Wah..
Aaj Kal K Bachon Ny Parhna Chhor Diya.
ACP Tha Toilet Me Aur DAYA Ny Darwaza Tor Diya
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#5
31. Pati ki Umar
Ek Survey se Maloom hua hai k.
Agar Patni "Karwa chauth" k vrat ki bajay...
"MAUN VRAT" rakhe
To Pati ki Umar aur lambi ho sakati hai
32. Veg or Nonveg
Air hostess to Lalu Yadav:
Sir, R U Veg or Nonveg?
Lalu : Ka matlab:
Air hostess :
Sir Mera matlab hai,
Aap Shakahari hen Ya Masahari?
Lalu : Huttt sasuri.
I am Bihari
33. Mother Tongue
Argument Between British And India.
British: We Spoiled Your Mother Land
For 200 Years.
India: We Are Spoiling
Your Mother Tongue Daily
34. Boy Asked To Bhagwan
Boy Asked To Bhagwan:-
Why she loves rose which dies in a day.
But Doesn't love me who dies for her every day?
Bhagwan: Mast Point Hai
Facebook pe dal de.
35. Paaro To Devdas
Paaro: Kiya Tum Mere liye Chand tod k la sakte ho?
Devdas: Phir Dharti k Chakker Kiya Tera Baap lagayega
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#6
36.Raat aur Suhagraat
Champa:Raat aur Suhagraat me kya fark hai?
Chameli:Suhagraat me Hum Sirf
Pati ke sath ho sakte hen.
Jab k Raat me aisi koi Pabandi nahi hai
37. Ghaas ho Tum
Gadha jo kha jaye wo Ghaas ho Tum.
Budhe Admi ka Chavanpras ho Tum.
Chahe Log kuch bhi Kahen,
Hum to yehi bolenge k bade Jhakass ho Tum
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#7
38.Why does Rajnikanth Wear Sunglasses?
.
.
.
To protect the Sun from His Eyes
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#8
39.Munna: Abey Curkit ye Baapu har Note pe Hasta q he re
Curkit: Simple he Bhai,
Agar Baapu Note me roega to Note Geela ho jayega
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#9
PATI:Kaash Me GANPATI Hota,
Tum Meri Pooja Karti, Laddu Khilaati.
PATNI:Kaash Aisa Hota,
Phir Har Saal Visarjan Ke Baad
Me NAYA GANPATI Laati
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#10
41.New Question in School Books:
Who invented the English Vowels
(A,E,I,O,U).?
.
.
.
.
Ans: Tusshar Kapoor in Film Golmaal
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#11
42. Shadi Se Pehly
Question: Bhagwan ko Ghussa Kab aata hai?
Ans: Jab koi Ladki shaadi se pehle
Pregnant ho jaye aur
Uski Maa Kahe,
Hey Bhagwan Ye Tu ne kiya kiya?
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#12
43. Divorce
Mrs Dass has Divorced Mr Dass.
Now She is.
.
.
.
BinDass
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#13
44.I Think
Teacher: Who was Chandragupta Maurya?
.
Santa: I think he was Brother of
.
.
GANPATI BAPPA MAURYA
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#14
45. Saas Di Photo
Savita Kumari Shadi ke liye
Ladka dekhne Gai.
Ladke ke Ghar Entry lene
se pehle Prayer krny Lagi:
.
Perbhu ya te Saas
Changi hove,
Ya te Us di
Photo Tangi hove
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#15
46. BJP Ka Parchar
Ek Larke Ne Ek Larki Ko Kamal Ka Phool Diya
Larki Ne Usko Ek Thappad Mar Diya
Larka Bola Me To BJP Ka Parchar Kar Raha Hun
Larki Boli Me Bhi Congress Ka Parchar Kar Rahi Hun
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#16
47. Ek Larki Match dekhne gayi
Ek Larki Match dekhne gayi,
Lips par India ke Tirange ka rang laga tha,
Ek Larka aaya Kiss kar gaya or Bola:
I LOVE MY INDIA
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#17
]48. I Will Marry
Father: You Should Marry This Girl.
She is Kalavati, Gunwanti, and Roop mati.
Son: I'll have to Marry My Girlfriend,
coz She is Garbhavati
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#18
49. Aadat
Husband : Shadi se pehly mere 15 larkiyon k saath affairs thy.
Wife : Mujhy pata tha k jab Kundli mil gai hai to
Aadaten bhi zarur milti hon gi
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#19
50. Bhootni
Tantrik Apnay Ek Bhagt Say :Beta Tum Par Ek Bhootni Ka Sayaa Hai.
Bhagt :Babaa Main Thappar Maar Dongaa,
Ager Meri Patni Kay BaRe
Mein Kuch Kahaa Toh[
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#20
51.Ek Aurat Company Me Manager Se Milne Gayi or bahar chaprasi se pucha-Sahab se mil sakti hu
Chaprasi-Ha,khubsurt aurate unse kabhi bhi mil sakti hai
Aurat-Thik hai unko jakar bolo unki biwi aayi hai
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#21
52.Beti:Maa GAON Me Bollywood Wale Aye Hen
Maa:Andar Aja Inki Niyat Boht Khrab Hoti Hy
Beti:Maa Imran Hashmi B Aya Hy
Maa
hir To Bakri Ko Bhi Andar Le Aa[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#22
53.Arz Karta Hu.
Tute hue dil ka murabba bana gayi,
Ghar ko mere kachre ka dabba bana gayi,
Nikah ke 3 mahine hi guzre the,
Na jane kis hisab se ABBA bana gyi.
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#23
54.EK Bache ne Darwaz Khola aur
apni Didi k boyfriend ko dekh k Masumiyat se Bola
Aap Roz didi se Milne aate ho aapki apni didi nahi hai kya?
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#24
55.Rikshewala: Bus Stop k 20 rs.
Santa: Saman b sath me hai.
Riskhewala:- Saman Free hai.
Santa:- Okay saman le chal maine padal aata hu.
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#25
56.Sabse Zyada Vitamin C mirchi Me hota hai
Yakin Na ho to Kaha k Dekho Body k sab parts C C karnge
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#26
]57.Arz Karta Hu..
Dil me Basaya unhe Jaanu Bana kar
Wah wah
Dil me basaya Unhe jaanu Bana kar
Wah wah
Kambaqht Wo kisi aur k Saath bhag gayi Hume mamu bana kar
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#27
58.2 Behre
Ek behra dusre se- Nahane ja rahe ho?
Dusra behra- Nahi, nahane ja raha hu
Pehla- Acha, mujhe laga nahane ja rhe ho
[PM 47]
Rank : Average Member
Status : Member
#28
59.Kirayedar- Malik rat me kamre me chuhe bahot nachate hai.
Malik-Arrey 500 rs kiraya dete ho, itne rupayo me kya SHAKIRA ko nachau fir?
[PM 1065]
Rank : Junkie
Status : Member
#29
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#30
some jokes from me:
I hate when my wife gets mad at me for being lazy.
It's not like I did anything!
I can't find my "Gone in 60 seconds" DVD.
It was here a minute ago!
A Bengali friend of mine told me that a third babe is coming!
Should I be delighted or agonised?
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#31
Dear Punjabis and Delhiites,
WFH is "Work from Home" not "Work from Himachal"!
Why do astronauts use Linux?
Because you can't open Windows in space!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#32
As a parent what you want and what you need is usually the same thing and that thing is, always sleep!
I was forced to swallow purple food color.
I feel violated!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#33
Psychiatrist: Do any of your relatives suffer from mental illness?
Man: No... they all seem to enjoy it!
Certain beers give me a terrible hangover.
I investigated and I think it's the 9th beer!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#34
The best thing about social media is how it teaches you about life.
Yes, that's the joke!
The very best part of any vacation is coming home and sleeping in your own bed!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#35
You don't realize how much stuff needs labeling until you buy a label-maker!
Someone laughing after they are finished crying is the human equivalent of a rainbow!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#36
Me: I live every day dangerously.
Friend: Are you into adventure sports?
Me: No, but I'm married and I live with my wife!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#37
Son: If we got another dog, where would it sleep?
Mom: The question isn't where would the dog sleep. It's where would your dad sleep!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#38
Pro Tip for girls:
Date ugly guys.
because chances of cheating are very low.
And vice versa!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#39
As a child, it seemed like parents had eyes on the back of their heads. As adults, it's clear that little kids are extremely predictable!
[PM 2713]
Rank : Junior Member
Status : Member
#40
Similarities between Corporate Meetings and Ladies Shopping
Corporate Meetings:
Show me the next slide.
The figures are not looking good (in the graph chart).
All eyes should be on us.
Something is still missing.
Do we have a plan B?
Make it fast, we have to close it ASAP.
Ladies Shopping:
Bhaiya Wo Agli Wali Dikhao.
Bhaiya Wo Pehli Wali Dikhao.
Is Mein Meri Figure Achhi Nahi Lag Rahi.
Sab Ka Dhyaan Meri Taraf Hi Hona Chahiye.
Ummm... Kuch To Kami Lag Rahi Hai.
Koi Dusri Dress Hai?
Behen Ji Jaldi Karo Dukaan Band Karni Hai
[PM 2251]
Rank : Newbie
Status : Member
#41
The more you look, the less you see
[PM 2239]
Rank : Junkie
Status : Member
#42
Manager: What is your qualification?
Pappu: I’m Ph.D.
Manager: What do you mean by Ph.D.?
Pappu: Passed high school with difficulty.