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+18 ****Adult Jokes**** |
Page: 3 |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#41 लड़की दूकानदार से:- CONDOM देना. दूकानदार(मस्ती मैं):- किस लिए! लड़की (गुस्से से):- तेरे बाप को गिफ्ट करूँगी, ताकि तेरे जैसा दूसरा चुतिया पैदा ना करे |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#42 Fully Latest ?? ??? ?????? मास्टर - कल स्कुल क्यूँ नहीं आये? बबलू - गल्फ्रेंड से मिलने गया था . मास्टर - किस लिये ? बबलू - येस सर. मास्टर - मैंने पूछा किस लिये? बबलू - लिये सर बहुत लिये... ?????? |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#43 ????? गन्या लाइट गेल्यामुळ मेनबत्ती घेउन हागायला निघालेला,, कोनी तरी आला आनि फुक मारुन म्हनाला हैपी बर्थडे टु यु... आणि मग गण्या म्हणाला मादरचोद !केक खाल्ल्याशिवाय जाऊ नको भाड्या !!!!! !!?????? |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#44 बाप : बेटा जब हम जवान थे 10 रु में जी भर के दुध पिया करते थे.। बेटा : पापा मजे थे आपके आजकल तो 300 रु. मे कोई दबाने भी नहीं देती!! . . . . . .बाप: तेरी माँ की mai भैंस के दूध की बात कर रहा हु भोसड़ी के दे थप्पड़... दे थप्पड़.. दे थप्पड़!! ?????? |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#45 A pole in the hole, make a new soul... Sex is game |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#46 KAMASUTRA says that.. sex is.. Duty- if done with ur wife.. Art- if done with ur love.. Education- if done with a virgin.. Tution- if done with ur teacher.. Job- if done with your boss/secretary.. Science- if done with a fertile lady.. Business- if done with a prostitute.. Social work - if done with ur neighbour Charity- if done with a widow Sacrifice- if done with ur own hand |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#47 Unsay kaho hum se jalna chhod de ... Ay dost.. Hum to woh siyah bakht hain agar kholayn LOTAY Ki Dukan,, to log Hagna chhod den.. :-D |
[PM 3084] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#48 Khawabon main chally ao!!! - - - - - - - - - k humain "Ahtlam"ho jaye tumhain bhi dard na ho aur humara bhi kam ho jaye" |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#49 टीचर : “बताओ लड़कियां ब्रा क्यों पहनती है ? ”पप्पू : साइन्स की वजह से” टीचर : “वो कैसे” पप्पू : “क्योंकि साइन्स भी.... इस बात को मानती है की खाने पीने की चीज़ो को ढककर रखना चाहिए..... टीचर : मादरचोद"......? ???????? |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#50 पडोसन की गांड मारते हुए पति को पत्नी ने देख लिया! रंगे हाथ पकड़े गये पति ने पत्नी को ऐसा जवाब दिया कि पत्नी खुश हो गई! "मैंने पहले ही बोला था कि जो कोई भी तेरे बारे में भला बुरा बोलेगा उसकी मैं गांड मार दूँगा!" |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#51 The latest bra from Victoria's Secret is called English Soccer. So much publicity... so much hope... but it has no cup! |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#52 There are 2 ways of living life: 1. Ab Kya Hoga Bhenchod 2. Bhenchod Jo Hoga Dekha Jayega Place Bhenchod correctly and move on in life! |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#53 Why underwear is named Langoti in Hindi? Because it takes care of 1 Lund and 2 Gotis! |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#54 KAMASUTRA says that.. sex is.. Duty- if done with ur wife.. Art- if done with ur love.. Education- if done with a virgin.. Tution- if done with ur teacher.. Job- if done with your boss/secretary.. Science- if done with a fertile lady.. Business- if done with a prostitute.. Social work - if done with ur neighbour Charity- if done with a widow Sacrifice- if done with ur own hand |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#55 Aids awareness slogan: Cover ur stump b4 u pump dont b silly, protect ur jelly.. AIDS is no joke wrap b4 u poke dont be fool condomize ur tool... ;-) |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#56 Guy: two times two is four, hour plus five is nine, I can put mine in yours, but you can’t put yours in mine. Girl: two times two is four, hour plus five is nine, I know the length of yours but you will never know the depth of mine. ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#57 Boy: How much calcium is there in ladies’ Breasts? Girl: I don’t have any thought.. yet it has enough calcium to push a Man’s boneless thing to standup! ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#58 Khawabon main chally ao!!! - - - - - - - - - k humain "Ahtlam"ho jaye tumhain bhi dard na ho aur humara bhi kam ho jaye" |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#59 Ek Baar Bandar Aur Girrafe Mein Deal Hoti Hai Ki Teri Biwi Meri Aur Meri Biwi Teri. Kuch Din Baad Girraffe Bandar Ko Milne Aata Hai Aur Dekhta Hai To Bandar Niche Gira Pada Hai, Muh Se Zaag Nikal Rahi Hoti Hai. Girraffe: “Arey Kya Hua Tujhe?” Bandar: “Bhenchod, Apni Biwi Wapas Le Ja.” Girraffe: “Kyu? Kya Hua? Maza Nahi Aaya?” Bandar: “Maza? Bhenchod Kiss Karne Upar Chadho, Mamme Dabane Niche Aao, Chodne Pichhe Jao, Bhenchod Gand Fat Gayi Meri Daud Daud Ke” |
Venom [PM 3176] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#60 एक महिला डॉक्टर के पास गयी और बोली: मेरे घुटने सूज गये है, इनकी सूजन कम करने की दवाई दे दो। डॉक्टर- ये चोट तुम्हे कैसे लगी? महिला- चोट-वोट नही लगी है, मेरे पति मुझे हमेशा कुतिया बनाकर चोदते है, तभी इनमें सूजन आ गयी है। डॉक्टर- तो किसी दूसरे स्टाइल में चुदा करो, और भी तो तरीके है चुदने के। महिला- है तो…पर उनसे मेरा TV सीरियल मिस हो जाता है। |
Conrad1234 [PM 989] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#61 very very good ones, thanks |
kuma_rraj1234 [PM 3758] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#62 Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals. |
the_prince [PM 4011] Rank : IrOnM@n Status : Advanced Member |
#63 Patni: Nashta Karlo. Husband: Sex hi Mera nashta hai. (Aur pati sex kame lag jata haj) Dopahar ko Patni : Lunch Karlo. Husband: Sex hi Mera lunch hai, • (Aur pati sex kame lag Jata haj) (Raat k0 jab pati ghar aata hai toh Patni panty utaar kar heater ke aago baithi hoti haj) Husband: Ye kya hai Patni : Hawas ke pujari khana garam kar rahi hun. ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
the_prince [PM 4011] Rank : IrOnM@n Status : Advanced Member |
#64 पिंकी= बस में अपने बॉयफ्रेंड की गोद में बैठी थी पिंकी ने कंडक्टर से कहा बस धीरे चलाओ जटके बहुत ज्यादा लग रहे हैं कंडक्टर= मैडम जी गोदी में से उठ कर देख बस तो कब से खड़ी है । ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
the_prince [PM 4011] Rank : IrOnM@n Status : Advanced Member |
#65 पिंकी=को इंग्लिश बोलने का बहुत शौक था शादी = की पहली रात उसे पता लगा कि उसके पति का सिर्फ एक ही पैर है पिंकी- गुस्से में मायके जाकर अपनी मां से बोली मां मेरे पति का सिर्फ 1 फुट है मां = हैरान होकर बोली बेटी तुझे और कितना बड़ा चाहिए ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
the_prince [PM 4011] Rank : IrOnM@n Status : Advanced Member |
#66 तेज बारिश में बस स्टॉप पर खड़ा पप्पू एक लड़की के निप्पल को देखकर बोला आपकी हेड लाइट ऑन है लड़की बिजली मेरी खर्च हो रही है या तेरी पप्पू मगरलोड तो मेरे खंबे पर पड़ रहा है ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
the_prince [PM 4011] Rank : IrOnM@n Status : Advanced Member |
#67 Patni= प्लीज जरा यह ब्रा का हुक लगा दीजिए pati= मैं इसके बदले 3 चुंबन लूंगा patni= रहने दो जी- पड़ोसी से फ्री में लगवा लेती हूं वह हाथ डालकर सेट भी कर देगा ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
the_prince [PM 4011] Rank : IrOnM@n Status : Advanced Member |
#68 पप्पू को लेडीस गारमेंट शॉप पर सेल्समैन की नौकरी मिल गई वहां पर एक लड़की आई और उसने कहा अंडरवेयर दिखाओ पप्पू = शर्माते हुए बोला आज नहीं पहना । ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#69 A woman walks out of the shower, winks at her boyfriend, and says, "Honey, I shaved myself down there. Do you know what that means?" The boyfriend says, "Yeah, it means the drain is clogged again."----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#70 A man and woman had been married for 30 years, and in those 30 years, they always left the lights off when having sex. He was embarrassed and scared that he couldn't please her, so he always used a big dildo on her. All these years she had no clue. One day, she decided to reach over and flip the light switch on and saw that he was using a dildo. She said "I knew it, asshole, explain the dildo!" He said, "Explain the kids!" ----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
[PM 4017] Rank : Junior Member Status : Member |
#71 ?? |
Testerguy [PM 2131] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#72 so funny hahah |
john_honai [PM 2239] Rank : Junkie Status : Member |
#73 A penguin takes his car to the shop and the mechanic says it'll take about an hour for him to check it. While he waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and orders a big sundae to pass the time. The penguin isn't the neatest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. When he returns to the shop, the mechanic takes one look at him and says, "Looks like you blew a seal." "No," the penguin insists, "it's just ice cream."----------------- 1 ❤: amit303, |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#74 Reporter: "Excuse me, may I interview you?" Man: "Yes!" Reporter: "Name?" Man: "Abdul Al-Rhazim." Reporter: "Sex?" Man: "Three to five times a week." Reporter: "No no! I mean male or female?" Man: "Yes, male, female... sometimes camel." Reporter: "Holy cow!" Man: "Yes, cow, sheep... animals in general." Reporter: "But isn't that hostile?" Man: "Yes, horse style, dog style, any style." Reporter: "Oh dear!" Man: "No, no deer. Deer run too fast. Hard to catch." |
[PM 4017] Rank : Junior Member Status : Member |
#75 ?? |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#76 They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running eight miles. Who the hell runs eight miles in 30 seconds? |
Person1234 [PM 3836] Rank : Junior Member Status : Member |
#77 What kind of bees make milk? Boo-bees. |
Person1234 [PM 3836] Rank : Junior Member Status : Member |
#78 Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack? He only comes once a year. |
Person1234 [PM 3836] Rank : Junior Member Status : Member |
#79 Welcome to the sexual inneundo club. Thank you all for coming. |
Person1234 [PM 3836] Rank : Junior Member Status : Member |
#80 Are you an elevator? Because I want to go up and down on you. |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#81 Patni: Nashta Karlo. Husband: Sex hi Mera nashta hai. (Aur pati sex kame lag jata haj) Dopahar ko Patni : Lunch Karlo. Husband: Sex hi Mera lunch hai, • (Aur pati sex kame lag Jata haj) (Raat k0 jab pati ghar aata hai toh Patni panty utaar kar heater ke aago baithi hoti haj) Husband: Ye kya hai Patni : Hawas ke pujari khana garam kar rahi hun. |
gmardikar [PM 1859] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#82 05 "ADULT"one liners What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me." "Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella. Two men broke into a drugstore and stole all the Viagra. The police put out an alert to be on the lookout for the two hardened criminals. They say that during sex you burn off as many calories as running eight miles. Who the hell runs eight miles in 30 seconds? I'll admit it, I have a tremendous sex drive. My girlfriend lives forty miles away. |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#83 Three brothers are traveling along a road, and their car dies. They all get out of the car, and start walking to a barn that's a little ways away. When they get their, the farmer comes out of the barn, and offers them a room for one night. He says to the first one, "You can sleep with the pigs," the second guy," you can sleep with the cows", and the third guy, "I like the cut of your jib. You can sleep with my 18 daughters." The next morning, he asks everyone how they slept. The first man said, "I slept like a pig." The second man said ,"I slept like a cow." The third guy said, "I slept like a rabbit. I jumped from hole, to hole, to hole." |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#84 What is the first thing a man puts in a woman when they get married? The wedding ring. |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#85 Why do women wear panties with flowers on them? In loving memory of all the faces that have been buried there. |
QwertyUpi [PM 4081] Rank : Beginner Status : Member |
#86 Ha ha ha, I've been reading all day |
daz007 [PM 4128] Rank : Average Member Status : Member |
#87 Kid 1: "Hey, I bet you're still a virgin." Kid 2: "Yeah, I was a virgin until last night ." Kid 1: "As if." Kid 2: "Yeah, just ask your sister." Kid 1: "I don't have a sister." Kid 2: "You will in about nine months." |
vickydoye [PM 5480] Rank : Newbie Status : Member |
#88 What does the receptionist at a sperm bank say as clients leave? A. Thanks for coming! |
geon [PM 7184] Rank : Newbie Status : Member |
#89 xaxaxaxa |
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